Noah, Hamlet, stuff

I have finally found homes for all my seven puppies, and I am so very relieved, done with looking after them except Noah of course, I’ll get to him in a sec. My conscience is now at peace that they are all safe and happy.

Since my mother’s kitchen is being renovated, I made the decision to come back and stay at my grandfather’s house. The ambience is not the same with my grandfather gone, everything reminds me of him, and I get sad everytime I think about him. At least I have 18 years full of memories with him in it….:)

Noah has ironically distracted me from dwelling too much on my loss, he is a real handful. Like a baby, he needs to be supervised constantly: cleaned up after, fed, put to sleep…etc…etc,.. what’s more is that he’s teething so he is chewing everything he can get his mouth on! I feel so terrible that I have neglected Chanel by not paying so much attention to her. I hope she understands why though.

Another aspect that’s keeping me busy is my assignments, I am counting down the weeks till I graduate, no more studying! Well, at least for a lil while. I am also finally done with homeschooling… yayyyy.. bliss… but for now, I am stuck reading Hamlet which is boring as heck…whoever thinks Shakespeare deserves to be put on a pedestal needs to be shot!… I miss doing Psychology… though challenging, it was mind-stimulating…

I now want to to read my time magazine before Noah gets up….then it’s back to taking care of him.

I am cute

I Want To Be RECOGNIZED

Being labeled as “disabled” in this country is like being shoved to the corner to be blatantly ignored. I do not expatiate this out of pure ignorance but rather I speak from what I have observed and experienced.

Peter Tan, a disabled man himself who is also an advocate for the rights of the disabled, mentioned that it is commendable that the ministry of Women, Family and Community Development has encouraged more disabled people to join the public sector. However, as he stressed also, what about the accessibility of public transportation for the disabled in this country? I for one will tell you that the public transportation in this country is disgraceful. Not only is it not accessible for disabled people, it is not strategically planned to reach all locations in K.L. (LRT, anyone?). In the end, there is really no point in mandating a percentage of employment be allocated to the disabled when the basic foundation or infratructure is not there.

Which is why I opted to learn how to drive. It has taken nearly two years to convince my mother to let me drive and to be utterly honest, a few close people in my life have in the past discouraged me from doing so. I can understand where these people came from, but I am not so sure they understand where I am coming from. I want my independence, I do not wish to be dependent or be a burden on other people which is why I chose to drive. I understand that Malaysia isn’t always a safe place to drive, but I need to take a chance on that simply because I do not want to be stopped from living life to the fullest that I can and for as long as I can. One day, I may not be able to see or hear, but if or until I cross that bridge, I want to push forward. God in His kindness has brought me this far, and I feel that since He has done so, He will see me through it.

When I approached Safety Driving Center in P.J., I voluntarily told them that I was OKU (Orang Kurang Upaya), or literally translated as People With Less Ability. I find that outrageously insulting, why not People With Special Needs???? Anyway, that’s a small matter and it’s just my personal opinion, it’s not their fault, it’s the government’s labeling, maybe the government should take up Linguistics & Semantics classes? Anyway, the nice lady at the SDC gave me a form to take to a government hospital in order for a doctor to render me ‘fit’ for driving.

I won’t drag you into the superfluous details but in a nutshell, I had to go through this rigorous driving simulation test. It tested my coordination, eye span, motor function and apparently, my logical reasoning. Do let me be straight with you, though the test was valid and practical, why should it be only applied to people with disabilities? I can give you a list of people who probably will not do so well in one or more of those entities in the test. What is more shocking is that vision, which is suppose to be the most important aspect in driving, is not properly and accurately tested in driving schools for people who don’t have disabilities. However, if you apply for OKU, you need to have 20/20 vision to be able to drive. How much more discriminatory can one get? Hands down, I can bet you that there are loads of people who stroll through these schools with vision that goes improperly tested!

It’s sad to know that if you are labeled as disabled, you are going to face the toughest challenges in this country. The majority of the accidents in this country are not caused by disabled people but rather by non-disabled people who are careless, apathetic or drunk. So there you have it, being OKU is not living in complete bliss with desirable privileges, it is just a label with discrimination painted all over it.

Thankfully, God willing,  I passed the test and hopefully, the doctor will sign my approval form. If the doctor does not, so be it. It just further proves my point. What reformation can there be if the simplest of things are not considered to be changed?

Another form of discrimination that plagues this country is job employment. I know for a fact that a disabled person’s chances for progressing through the private or public sectors are slim. This is paramount in why I want to study and live in the United States. I admit that discrimination runs rampant all over the world but at least in U.S., the law is such that discrimination is prohibited when considering job employment. As far as I know, people over there are more likely to judge you based solely on your credentials. That is what I yearn for, to be offered an equal playing field where I will not be judged because of NF. I know I am capable of so much more if I just be given that chance to prove myself.

Having all said and done, I know my grandfather’s spirit is apart of me and as he had to fight for everything that he gained, so shall I. I will continue to fight against prejudice, I will continue to work hard for a better future, I will continue to not lose faith…. I will continue.. to be RECOGNIZED.

A Sonnet in Faithful Prayer: And Faith Alone Shall Set You Free

2 Reasons why I have not updated: Puppies are like babies, they take up so much of time and responsibility, it’s hard to balance. I tell you, they’re angels when they are sleeping but when they’re awake, they’re devils! Haha, I can’t wait to have them placed in their respective homes. Secondly, I have been running around doing this and that that I just feel worn out at the end of the day.

 

But I tell you what I am chuffed about,  I have finally started the process of driving. Though time-consuming, you know with having to get medical tests done and pre-driving assessment done, it’s all worth it. I’ve been craving for this independence for a long time, and I feel like a caged-bird set free. I needed the support of certain people in my life to make this happen, and I am glad they are finally giving it!

 I wrote and recited a sonnet in commememoration of my late grandfather’s memory at his memorial service on Sunday July 13th. I wrote this sonnet as a tribute to his faith in God, simple as that. But in retrospect, the message pervades humanity, it’s universal and I love sonnets because of its brevity and its ability to convey a powerful message in a short and simple way.

So there you have it, A Sonnet in Faithful Prayer.

I awake each morning wearing a cloak of peace,

For I lie bathed in your warmth and radiant light.

The foreboding night will now cease,

Rising from the east to soothe my plight.

As life’s glistening Star descends to sleep in the west,

the Promise is eclipsed by agonizing fear and pain.

Once more, Earth faces its greatest test,

Wondering if the Beacon of Light will be back again.

Earth’s inhabitants need not live in the state of alarm,

As eternal Faith provides wings to soar over obstacles,

With endurance, a shield to protect us from harm.

Witness now Faith’s beautiful and glorious miracles!

So dear friends, do you now see?

That the Sun will always rise, and Faith ALONE shall set you free.

 

(c) Keisha Petrus